When we use control and leadership in the same sentence, our brows start to furrow. We see controlling behavior as an anathema to empowerment–something to be summarily eradicated, not embraced.
Well, yes, sort of.
Controlling behavior in leadership–when used within relationships–is clearly bad. The world doesn’t need more micro-managers, we have plenty. But make the distinction clear: when used within relationships is the qualifier.
Personally controlling the controllable is something altogether different. And no, I’m not simply playing with words. Let me explain…
Relationships notwithstanding, there is a lot going on in a typical manager’s world. Changes, innovations, developing people, idiotic boss demands… the list goes on. Add to that the occasional “he’s touching me!” and we see quickly that the old, tired phrase “control is just an illusion” is neither old nor tired enough. In fact, it’s still pretty damned active.
There are so many things–most things–over which leadership has little or no control, that for those things we can control, we should do so viciously and purposefully. Our own behavior, for example. The feedback I give others… whether I decide to mentor someone or not… how I act/react to challenges–do I show resilience, modeling that behavior for others, or do I run around shrieking and pulling my hair?
We don’t control much in the big scheme of things, but we do control more than we often think. Grab those things you do control, make sure they happen as you want them to, and save the mental and emotional bandwidth for those things where control is simply a distant mirage, making us believe that water is just over the next sand dune.
I recently had a conversation with some really smart people around Dan Pink’s
book, Drive: The surprising truth about what motivates us. Read the book, it’s a good one, discussing how intrinsic motivation trumps extrinsic almost all the time. If you were expecting me to now give you some detailed book review, you’re about to be disappointed.
As these things often do, we ended up in an extended “bunny trail” conversation around the whole subject of individual responsibility and accountability, and what that really meant from a leadership perspective.
Here’s what we discovered during our lengthy and oft-times pseudo-cerebral discussions:
Responsibility–the easiest part. Responsibility is simply a list of things we do, tasks we perform, jobs we are given. Alan Weiss called this “inputs.” You can be responsible for myriad things, both that you specifically control, and some… well, not so much.
In my world, I’m responsible for coaching, facilitating, consulting, providing proposals, answering emails and calls, responding promptly to clients, etc.
These are all Responsibilities.
Accountability–it’s not the same as “blame,” per se, though there is a certain sect of people who would ascribe such. No, it’s bigger than that, yet infinitely simpler. It’s the outcomes of our responsibilities. It’s the results expected from our inputs.
For me, improved leadership behavior, demonstrably better skills, increased performance of a business, function, or enterprise (that actually follows my consulting or advice!) are all Accountabilities. It’s the results or outcomes of my Responsibilities.
We often confuse these two, yet the differences are both clear and significant. Pay attention to them.
Leadership–heavily influences both Responsibility and Accountability. For instance, we influence–actually determine–what a subordinate’s Responsibilities will be. We tell them what we want them to do, what we expect them to be working on, when to be there, etc. Leaders have, quite literally, 100% control (there’s that word) over employee Responsibilities.
Now Accountability gets a bit fuzzier.
Yes, leadership determines, from a starting level, what results and/or outcomes that an employee will be Accountable for (sorry for the dreaded stranded preposition–couldn’t be helped). But there is also a measure of personal acceptance required for real Accountability to be visible to others–an important component.
An employee can be Accountable “because I said so,” but evidence of that employee actually accepting that Accountability requires a willingness on their part to demonstrate that accountability openly, e.g., “Yes, I did that,” “No, it wasn’t an accident, it was my intent,” “That was my responsibility, and I didn’t do it,” and so on. These demonstrate acceptance of accountability, and that’s something only the individual can do.
Now, leadership clearly influences all of this. Leadership has to make sure that Responsibilities are clear, reasonable, and have value. Leaders must also ensure that an environment exists where accepting Accountability is not necessarily fatal; that demonstrating Accountability is a mark of courage and success, not of weakness and/or failure.
There is an old joke/fable that most of you have probably heard… it goes something like this:
One day a manager was scouring the countryside for a solid candidate, but striking out everywhere. Lions were too lazy, elephants ate too much, monkeys wouldn’t sit still. The eagles always wanted to be in charge. This manager, beaten and depressed, dropped down and sat in the middle of a field.
Shortly, he heard a hissing, and looked next to his foot… it was a 6-foot rattlesnake! “Hey, there,” said the snake. “I hear you need help. Just hire me, and all your troubles will be over. I’m crafty, pretty fast, and not trying to climb any ladders.”
“Wait a minute…” said the manager, “… you’re a snake! I’ll have to check your references first.” So, the manager contacted people whom the snake had been with before, and sure enough, “You don’t have a very good reputation,” said the manager. “They all say that hiring you will just come back to bite me.”
“C’mon,” said the snake. “Those people are just disgruntled, and maybe even a little jealous. Trust your gut — you need me.”
So, the manager finally acquiesced and hired the snake, who turned out to be a super employee. The manager began thinking he nearly misjudged, and that the references were misguided. Then one day, of course, the snake simply slithered up alongside and bit the manager on the leg.
“WHAT???” cried the manager… “You promised that if I would just give you a chance, this wouldn’t happen.”
“Yes, I did,” said the snake, “but you knew I was a snake when you hired me.”
Now, the real joke is much longer, but you get the idea. In this war for competitive, competent talent, it’s easy to ignore our instincts and available proof, and succomb to the belief that, “maybe they’ll work out after all.”
If something looks too good to be true, or you are convinced through judgment, history, or instinct that it’s wrong… run away from it.
So, a physicist, a preacher and an Iman walk into this bar…
Though that has all the makings of a great joke (appropriate apologies to those easily offended), I just wanted to highlight the diverse uses of today’s topic.
The three characters mentioned above are the most frequent users–or at least, most frequently referenced–of the Principle of Before, also referred to as the Empirical Priority Principle. Seems physicists thrive on making complexity from the simple… but I digress. Defined, The Before Principle “…asserts that within the circle of the world, what comes before determines what comes after without exception.”
Lots of examples for this. Battles before victories. Sweat before gains. Planning before execution. Investment before returns. (more…)
Leaders, new and old, sometimes lose sight of the most fundamental tenets of leadership. Here’s a reminder…
I frequently tell executives that leadership – its concepts, theory, and core applications – haven’t changed in a millennium. Some our demographics may have changed, forcing us to use alternative applications of those concepts, but the basic concepts and theory remain.
So, why don’t we “just do it?” Sometimes we aren’t motivated; sometimes the “time” just doesn’t seem right. Maybe we simply forgot some of the basics… hence this article.
I use the following rules for both new managers/leaders, as well as for any level of leadership when taking on a new role – some good things to not forget. So, here goes…
Kevin’s Survival Kit for New Managers — 5 Irrefutable Laws
Never delay or abrogate a decision that must be made. Make it and move on. You may have to immediately make another decision; this doesn’t mean your first one was wrong, merely that your second one had the benefit of additional knowledge.
If you want something specific done, say so specifically, using clear, plain language. Employees, generally, have some difficulty doing their basic jobs; adding “mind-reading” to their description is just plain unfair.
If you always answer employee’s every question, you’ll forever be answering employees’ every question. Questions are teaching moments — don’t rob employees of the opportunity.
Make your expectations clear, then back up a bit and give employees room to do their job. That doesn’t mean “never look back;” to inspect what you expect isn’t micro-management, it’s just good-management.
Employees need their managers to be leaders; they don’t need a shoulder, a buddy, a sympatico, or a commiserator. If you want a friend, buy a dog.
Please print these out, laminate, and put in your top desk drawer…
