Don’t get me started on my latest “airport-TSA” story. I’m trying to block that out, and you really don’t want to hear it.

Back at the hotel, I ordered light room service, having worked well past lunch with a client. Here’s the telephone conversation:

Me: Yes, and I’d also like a glass of water.
Her: Dassani or Perriere?
Me: Just a glass of water, thanks.
Her: Sorry, sir, we have only Dassani and Perriere.
Me: No (a little agitated), just a glass of ice water.
Her: Sir, I’m trying to explain, we have only Dassani and Perriere.
Me: You don’t have a GLASS??
Her: Well, I suppose we do… you just want, like, out of a faucet?

To coin Bill Engvall, “Here’s your sign…”

And while I’m at it…

Who designs hotel room electrical outlets? Only 9 in the whole place, 7 or 8 of which are occupied by one hotel device or another. We have to make decisions like, “reading light, or telephone charger?” What’s up with that?

And finally, a delicate mention: 70% of all air travelers are men. Why, then, have airlines not done anything about the toilet seats that simply cannot stay up, slamming down at the most inopportune times?? Men know what I’m talking about here…

Why do these things things occur? Leaders let them, that’s why. The hotel room service clerk was obviously trained on this dialog, to sell more $4 water bottles. The electrical outlets are scarce because someone in charge didn’t ask travelers about it — merely designed for the hotel’s convenience. And the airplane toilet seats, well, I don’t know exactly, but if I ever find the moron who did that…

 

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